


Have You Ever Needed Someone So Bad

by cyncyn1110



Series: And the Song Goes on [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Confession, M/M, Shapeshifter, s01 between e6/e7
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-22
Updated: 2015-01-22
Packaged: 2018-03-08 14:16:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3212210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyncyn1110/pseuds/cyncyn1110
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The shapeshifter says some things that leave Sam wondering.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Have You Ever Needed Someone So Bad

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like! Let me know :)

"Sam, look at me."

"Dean I'm fine." Sam huffed

" No, c'mon Sammy you haven't talked to me for days now." Dean blocked Sam's way before he could retreat to the bathroom. 

"Dude, yes I have! We've been talking all day." Sam gave Dean his best annoyed look.

"No you've kept it on the surface since St. Louis. What the hell happened? What did that shapeshifter do to you?" Dean spread his arms protecting the bathroom door. 

"He didn't DO anything! And you're bitching about keeping it on the surface? What happened to "no chick flick moments"? Sam continued to hedge around Dean but he was not giving in. 

"Fine asshole what did he say?"Dean thew his hands in the air in frustration. 

"Nothing, Dean! It doesn't matter, just drop it." Sam yelled.

Dean took a step closer to Sam and let his hands land just under The hem of his brothers shirt. He felt Sam tense under his touch and it left him cold inside.

"Then why haven't you touched me in weeks?" Dean kissed Sam's jaw then tucked his face into Sam's neck.  
"I just got you baby, don't shut me out now." 

He felt it the moment Sam gave in. His brothers body relaxed against his. Sam's arms circled Dean and he buried his nose in Deans hair breathing in the scent of his shampoo. They stood there for a minute before Dean walked Sam backwards towards the bed closest to the door and pushed him down to sit on the edge then kneeled in front of him.

"Tell me what he said." Sam tried to look away but Dean grasped his chin and made him keep eye contact. 

"He said you were a sick pathetic fuck. Said you were only doing this", he motioned between Dean and himself, " so I wouldn't abandon you again. He said I left and even Dad left and you knew I would leave for good this time so you did what you thought was necessary. Dean I told you it was like he was downloading you're memories, what if he could do the same with your feelings and even if he was lying he could have been telling the truth. If you don't want me that way Dean you have to tell me. I won't leave but if you don't want this and you're only doing it.... No I can't Dean you have to tell me."

Dean bowed his head and Sam's heart sunk. "He's right I am a sick fuck. He may have had my memories but he did not know how I felt. You were 16 when I first realized that I was fucked up. You remember that blonde girl that kissed you in the library in Kentucky? I saw that. I watched her lean in and kiss you and I saw you kiss her back. I was pissed. I couldn't figure out why but I was so mad at you. I remember picking a huge fight with you that night."

Sam snorted "Yeah you were being such an ass to me and I couldn't figure it out and you kept playing that stupid Def Leppard song. What is it with you and Def Leppard?"

"Hell I wasn't quite sure until we left town and I was so glad you wouldn't see her again. 'Mine' was all that kept running through my head. I wanted to be your first kiss. How twisted is that? That weekend I asked Dad to take me to Bobby's. I did so much research, tried to figure out if it was a curse or a spell, hell even a succubas but nothing fit. I tried to perform an exorcism on myself and Bobby caught me and asked if I was on drugs." Dean laughed but there was really no humor in it.

"I mean how the hell was I supposed to protect you when I just wanted to be with you?"

"Is that the weekend you came back all marked up? You said you did it working on a car. I was so pissed you left me behind with dad." Sam's brow furrowed at the memory 

"Yeah I tried some pretty questionable stuff. Nothing worked. So I just faked it. I knew you were off limits. That I was some freak perv. When you left it took all I had to say no to you. To not hold you back from that apple pie life I knew you always wanted. I tried to leave you alone Sammy, I swear I tried so hard. You deserve better than this, than me."

Sam didn't realize Dean was crying until he felt his jeans were wet at the knee Dean's head was bowed over. He reached out and pulled Dean's chin until their eyes met again. He kissed Dean lightly on the lips and pulled back. His own eyes wet.

"I was 14 when I knew how I felt. I thought if you knew you'd hate me. Make dad leave me somewhere. I used to follow you on your dates and pretend it was me there with you. I left because I couldn't take it anymore. Being so close to you but not being able to touch or taste. I was going insane Dean. I had to leave. Me asking you if you wanted me was a last ditch effort. I stayed really fucked up for a long time. Jess really helped me. She knew everything. She was the only person. When you came for me she was worried I would come back a mess. Fuck I guess I sort of did." He said bitterly.

"Sammy, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I hurt you, I'm sorry I made you leave you're best friend alone and that thing got to her. But know that whatever this is I want it. Always have." 

"No Dean, Jess is on me. But I'm here now, I'm with you because you want me." Sam slid forward slowly making Dean lay back on the carpet. He straddled him and leaned forward kissing both of Deans eyes before moving down to his mouth. He licked inside softly, running his tongue along his brothers teeth before slipping it past to reach the velvet softness of his tongue. He moaned when Dean began sucking at the intrusion and rocking his hips under Sam's weight. 

Before they could go further Sam stood and pulled Dean to his feet. He reached down and pulled Deans shirt off then undid his brothers jeans letting them drop to the floor before beginning to work on his own clothes. 

Dean just watched while kicking his shoes off until Sam's belt gave him trouble. He placed his hands over Sam's and squeezed them before moving them away. Once the belt gave way he slid Sam's jeans and boxers down slowly, letting them drag along Sam's hard cock and making him suck in air at the sensation. Dean leaned forward and kissed and sucked Sam's neck leaving a wet trail along the thick chord of muscle. Sam began to pull Dean down onto the bed with him but Dean resisted. When he searched Deans eyes he found a shyness he had never seen there before.

"Um... So do you wanna.... I mean I know we haven't....." Dean looked down at his feet unable to put into words what he wanted but Sam knew anyway. 

He leaned forward and licked the shell of Deans ear before whispering "The answer has been yes for a long time."

Dean shivered and found Sam's lips with his own kissing Sam deeply before pulling away and moving to the other bed where his duffel sat. He rifled through the side pocket and came back with a small bottle of lube and a condom. Sam was laying back on the bed with his legs splayed as an invite for Dean. The look Dean gave him said he felt very welcome. 

Sam sucked in a breath when Dean instantly started sucking at the tip of his cock. Dipping his tongue into the slit and reaching down with his hand to roll Sam's balls. When Dean slid his mouth to the base Sam could feel himself hit the back of Deans throat and he nearly lost it then. His brother must have felt it too because he pulled his lips off with a pop and squeezed the base of Sam's dick to keep him calm. "Not yet baby." Sam's dick gave a twitch at the term of endearment and Dean filed that away for later and took Sam in his mouth again.

Sam was consumed by the swirl of Deans tongue so he didn't notice Dean slicking his fingers with the contents of the small bottle. He only felt the cool sensation as his rim was circled by the toughest hands turned gentle. He felt himself relax under the light pressure Dean was applying there. He wanted more, now. He said so with a flick of his hips that caused Deans teeth to scrape lightly and Sam let out a groan that made Dean want inside Sammy just as badly. 

Dean slowly slid his middle finger in pausing before moving it in and out allowing Sam to adjust. His baby brother was tight and Dean couldn't wait to feel that heat wrapped around him. Sam moaned and pushed down urging Dean to continue. 

By the time Dean had three fingers sliding in and out Sam was losing his mind. "Dean please, I need you now."

Dean was rock hard and the pleading in Sam's voice made his slit leak a giant drop of precome that he wiped off before sliding on a condom.  
He lined himself up with Sam's hole and pushed in slowly.

The sound Sam made wasn't human. When Dean checked his face for pain what he found there made him shiver. Sam was completely blissed out. His mouth hung open slightly and his eyes were closed and he looked like he was in heaven. 

Dean pulled out a little then buried himself to the hilt making Sam cry out "Dean!" and grip his arms in pleasure. Dean quietly made himself a promise that his name would be the only one Sam ever screamed that way. 

With a few more pumps Dean found that sweet bundle of nerves that made Sam arch his back and roll his eyes so he worked it into his rhythm hitting it every time he circled his hips before pulling back then starting all over again. 

Sam knew he wasn't going to make it much longer. He could feel his balls tightening and knew all it would take was another swift movement from Dean so he reached down to stroke himself to the end but was surprised when Dean smacked his hand away and wrapped his own around Sam stroking roughly and that was all Sam needed to reach one of the most intense orgasms of his life. 

Dean continued to move in and out of him as he himself came just seconds later. He leaned forward and locked his mouth on Sam's drawing his brother's air into his own lungs then pushing it back into Sam's. It was the most intimate thing Dean had ever done with anyone and while he would never admit it, it was something that would only feel right with the one person that all of Deans emotions were tied up in. 

Dean pulled away too soon for Sam. The emptiness he felt when Dean pulled out was even worse. If it were up to him Dean would stay right where he was and Sam could fall asleep and wake up with the most important thing in his life within reach. 

As Dean was tying up the condom and throwing it in the trash, Sam snuck into the bathroom to clean up. He could hear Dean singing through the shut door.

"Have you ever wanted someone you just couldn't have...."

Sam opened the door and Dean gave him a glare as he walked past him to clean himself up as well. "Def Leppard is not stupid bitch"

"Whatever jerk" Sam muttered, although he couldn't help but smile a little. Dean had a song for him. It may be a sad song but as important as music was to Dean so was Sam.  
He sat on the bed furthest from the door and turned the lamp off before slipping under the sheets. 

When Dean finished up in the bathroom he stood and watched Sam breath in deep. He really wanted to climb next to the long lump and fall asleep with his face tucked in between his shoulder blades. He wouldn't push it though. Not yet. He made sure to avoid the wet spot as he laid down and replayed what they had done just a few minutes before as he drifted off.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sent from my iPhone


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